Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
Please share this story with your friends and family if you think it was funny.
The 5-year-old piano prodigy plays for his 101-year-old grandmother, her last request brings him to tears
Piano prodigy Ryan Wang recently performed an extraordinary private concert for 101-year-old Dorothy Landry, months after he captivated audiences on “The Ellen Show” and graced the stage at Carnegie Hall. This special performance was organized by CBC Music, a Canadian digital music distributor, and featured five-year-old Ryan playing “Variations on an Inner Mongolian Folk Song” exclusively for Landry.
Although Dorothy had been an avid fan of Ryan since he was three years old, her hearing impairment made it difficult for her to fully enjoy his public performances. To address this issue, CBC Music arranged a private concert that gave Dorothy an intimate musical experience.
In a cozy atmosphere, Dorothy sat in her wheelchair while young Ryan performed beside her, clutching a large teddy bear and jumping with excitement. Ryan expressed to “Grandma Dorothy” how much it meant to him to play just for her, and her face beamed with joy at the personal touch of the performance.
Dorothy was keen to show her gratitude by calling Ryan a “very special little human” and sharing her excitement for his future performances. She also invited Ryan to visit her again after his upcoming trip to China and expressed her heartfelt thanks. This heartfelt exchange highlights the profound connections that music can create across generations and borders.
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