Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
Please share this story with your friends and family if you think it was funny.
Barbra Streisand and her husband James Brolin reveal a juicy secret they have kept for decades during their 25th anniversary celebration
Barbra Streisand and James Brolin are celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary this year. The couple opened up about their journey together and reflected on what it means to find love later in life.
They recently revealed a surprising secret about their relationship that had been kept secret for years. Read on to find out what they shared!
Their love story, like many others, began with a blind date. Barbra was dating James, but had a different idea of what he would look like. She expected a man with a full head of hair and a beard and was surprised to find Brolin bald.
True to her easy-going nature, Streisand didn’t hold back and jokingly pointed out that his hair was a bit messy. Instead of being offended, Brolin immediately felt a connection and realized she was someone special. While it took Streisand a few more outings to fully accept her feelings, the two soon fell in love and married in 1998.
This was not her first marriage; Streisand was previously married to Elliot Gould from 1961 to 1973, with whom she has a son, Jason. Brolin has also had two previous marriages, first to casting agent Jane Agee for 20 years and then to Jane Smithers for almost a decade. From these relationships he has three children: Josh, Jess and Molly, and four grandchildren: Eden, Trevor, Westlyn and Chapel.
Brolin often expresses his deep affection for Streisand, once saying: “Every night is a new adventure. Sleeping is a waste of time. I can’t wait to see her again in the morning”.
In a recent interview with Gayle King on CBS Mornings, the couple celebrated their milestone anniversary by sharing a surprising revelation: Brolin was celibate for three years before meeting Streisand.
“I was literally abstinent for three years and I asked myself: ‘Who needs that?’” he confessed, which provoked disbelief from King. Streisand playfully admonished him, shouting: “You can’t say that!”
When asked about his long period without intimacy, Brolin explained: “I had no interest in getting involved in a crappy situation”. Reflecting on their connection, he remarked: “After three years, that must have been one hell of a night?” to which he replied: “Wild!”
His reluctance stemmed from his previous marriages, as he did not want to enter into another unfulfilling relationship. However, a friend encouraged him to meet Barbra and the rest is history. It took some persuasion, but after asking her three times, Streisand finally agreed to marry him.
It’s surprising to learn that Brolin was celibate for such a long time! Their story is heartwarming and shows how they found each other despite all the odds. What do you think about their pairing? Share it in the comments! Feel free to pass this on to others to know their thoughts!
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