It’s uplifting to witness women supporting each other, whether it’s friends offering help or strangers extending support to those they’ve never met. In this story, a woman quietly left a letter for her ex-boyfriend’s future girlfriend, offering a heads-up about what to anticipate and sharing lessons from her own experience. The new girlfriend shared this moving act of solidarity on Reddit, where she received an outpouring of encouragement and advice from the online community.
She wrote:
“My boyfriend Steve (30m) and I (28f) have been together for 2 years and have been living together for 8 months. I was cleaning our apartment when I found a note in the back of a cabinet that read:
‘Dear Steve’s Future Girlfriend,
I know it’s you reading this because he’d never clean back here. I’m putting this here because I’m leaving him soon and want to warn you about him:
1-He will not clean;
2-He will not listen;
3-He will make everything feel like it’s your fault;
It’s not your fault, he’s just an incompetent man. I’m leaving him, I suggest you do the same.
Best wishes, Natalia'”
She added:
“I read the note and brought it to show to him and hear his response. He immediately ripped it up and said not to listen to it, that she was crazy and untrustworthy. I told him that the fact that he hasn’t found the note in the 5 years since they broke up is a red flag to me because it does mean he’s never cleaned back there and that he has been cleaning less and less since I moved in.
He told me this is just his ex continuing to manipulate and ruin his life, and I was letting it work. We continued to argue along the same lines, and I eventually left to spend the night at a friend’s place.
Steve has been a great boyfriend so far. He gets along with my family. He has given me gifts and flowers and always tells me how much he loves me. He’s not wrong that the cleaning hasn’t really been brought up before, but the note made me realize it had been less and less and that we needed to have a full conversation about this.”
She went on explaining:
“He texted me afterwards saying he’s sorry that I felt like I had to leave, but that it’s a wrong move for me to take a note over our 2-year relationship and to leave him and our pets alone. I don’t know what to do or what to believe right now. I’m contemplating trying to find and reach out to Natalia.
Steve thinks I should come back home and let it go, that his past should not affect our future. He makes it sound like his ex was manipulative and petty throughout their relationship, but I don’t know what to trust.
When we moved in together 8 months ago, the cleaning was 50/50. Since then, he’s been doing things less and less. I have to remind him to do things like to bring his plates to the sink or take out the trash, and I didn’t have to before. The dishes will pile up unless I do them, to the point he’s had leftover food mold on the plates.”
She continued:
“I’m not a confrontational person, so I was just asking him to fix it when it came up. The note made me reflect on it more and try to have an actual full conversation, and I will say I didn’t feel listened to when I talked to him about it.
I tried to use the note to start a conversation about cleaning, and he got so stuck on the fact that I was listening to his ex instead of him, that he wouldn’t listen to what I think are valid concerns. He thinks I’m letting the note have “confirmation bias” so no matter what he says I’ll think he’s in the wrong.
Also, I didn’t leave him permanently, this all happened yesterday and I only spent one night at a friend’s because I didn’t feel like our conversation was going anywhere last night, and he wouldn’t let me sleep until I let it go. I’m going back today and wanted to get advice and feedback before I do.”
Other Redditors chimed in, sharing their own insights and offering advice to her.
- I’m so glad for you. It wasn’t two wasted years since they taught you a valuable lesson. I’m especially grateful for Natalia! Please tell her we love her for her kind solidarity and witty ways. Absolutely, leave a note — but better yet, leave two. One in the same place (he’ll look there; manipulative narcissists aren’t that dumb), and another in an even less likely spot. Sending you my best. You got this, girl! © occasionalpart / Reddit
- Well, he’s not cleaning, he’s not listening to you, and he’s making it out to be your fault “for trusting a note over him.” So, it seems the ex’s assessment might be accurate. It doesn’t look like he’s open to discussing his poor housekeeping, and personally, I don’t think you’ll be able to address it now without the note coming up. Ultimately, it’s up to you to decide whether this is something you can tolerate. It seems he hasn’t learned anything from his last relationship. © VonBoo / Reddit
- You’ve been living together for less than a year, and you’re already having to play mommy, reminding him of basic chores and daily tasks! If Natalia were truly such a manipulative, crazy person, she would have made much harsher and more dramatic accusations than these. © Arya_kidding_me / Reddit
- It’s almost ironic how easy it would have been for him to shut this entire thing down with the simplest of responses: “Hmm, you’re right, I’ll make sure to clean more.” That would have immediately countered points 2 and 3. But he’d rather be right, and he’d rather play the aggrieved party. You didn’t do anything wrong by trying to have a conversation off the back of that note. His reaction should tell you everything. © Mobius_Stripping / Reddit
- I’d be willing to bet money that the note is right. He sounds like the kind of man who will stop doing anything the second he decides a woman is fully trapped. The slow tapering off you’re witnessing is him testing the waters. He needs to figure out whether he just needs to waste enough of your time to get to that stage, or whether you need a ring or a baby to feel trapped. © Extension_Drummer_85 / Reddit
- “Don’t expect to change a man unless he’s in diapers.” This behavior will continue on, he’s gotten away with it before up to a certain point. He wants someone to pick up after him like his mommy.
Any time a guy says, “My ex is/was crazy,” is a MASSIVE red flag right there. It’s something guys have been saying since the dawn of time to belittle their former partners. He’ll say the same thing about you to his next girlfriend. You have to ask yourself, “Was she crazy, or did he drive her crazy with his behavior and laziness?” I’d leave your own note when you do finally dump him. And reach out to his ex, see what she has to say. © Equal-Brilliant2640 / Reddit
When trust is broken between couples, it often leads to a surge of emotional and psychological turmoil, including feelings of uncertainty and profound confusion. In a different scenario, a woman shared a fascinating story of her own sleuthing skills. She discovered her husband was cheating simply by paying close attention to his breakfast order.
Couple has 3 sets of twins in 5 years after being told they can’t have kids, they all share the same birthday
Carrie and Craig Kosinski responded positively when a long-lost family friend requested them to watch her infant twins.
Carrie and Craig offered to temporarily assume custody of the adorable girls.
Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, and eventually the girls were a permanent part of the family.
For Carrie and Craig, having children had always been a dream, but they had no idea how their journey would turn out.
The births of Adalynn and Kenna occurred on February 28, 2014. The twins were born via emergency C-section, and at the age of three months, the Kosinkis were granted legal custody of the infant girls.
After a few years of parenting their adoptive twins, Carrie and Craig got a call from their original mother, who revealed that she was dealing with yet another tragic circumstance.
She was battling to make everything work while dealing with serious challenges in her life. She asked the couple if they would be open to adopting her two younger kids, Cece and J.J., twins who are two years old.
The younger twins were biologically related to Kenna and Adalynn.
From Union Grove, Wisconsin, Carrie and Craig had to consider their options carefully.
The couple had made numerous unsuccessful attempts to become pregnant before beginning the adoption process with Kenna and Adalynn.
They sought medical attention because they had no idea what was wrong for a while, and the doctor broke some devastating news.
The medical professional informed Carrie that due to her severe endometriosis, she was unable to conceive naturally. Therefore, having biological children was essentially out of the question; this is why they initially turned to adoption.
“It was a difficult decision. We were trying to get pregnant ourselves. But they were siblings so that was definitely was part of our consideration — we wanted to keep the siblings together,” Carrie told The Journal Times.
Carrie and Craig, however, put aside their private worries and informed the mother that they would be delighted to adopt the younger twins.
But not long after welcome Cece and J.J. into the family, Carrie started to feel off and knew she needed to see a doctor.
An ultrasound in September 2015 confirmed Carrie’s own pregnancy. Actually, there were two fetuses visible on the screen! In the past five years, she and Craig have welcomed three sets of twins.
”We were in shock, but super happy,” Carrie Kosinski explained.
Craig and Carrie understood their pregnancy was a gift from a higher power, despite their first overwhelm. All six of the children would be raised in a secure, loving home, the parents resolved.
But destiny would soon bring the family back, and their medical professionals could hardly believe what had transpired.
Unbelievably, the other two sets of twins’ birth dates, February 28 and March 1, were shared by biological twins Karraline and Clarissa.
”We were very shocked. We were like ‘oh my God we are going to have three sets of twins. What are we going to do with ourselves?’”, Carrie recalled.
The fact that all of Carrie and Craig’s kids have the same birthday is proof positive that this was meant to be, according to the delighted parents.
The Journal Times quotes Carrie as saying, “God certainly has a sense of humor.”
In week 25 of her pregnancy, Carrie used in vitro fertilization to give birth to Karraline and Clarissa. Sadly, their biological twins had to stay in neonatal intensive care for several months. Karraline and Clarissa, however, were in good health and shape when they were finally permitted to return home.
Three pairs of twins living under one roof is obviously expensive, but several members of the neighborhood have offered financial assistance.
Kind strangers from across the nation provided the family with financial assistance to cover their rising bills and expensive charges through fundraising websites like GoFundMe and AdoptTogether.
”I have to be very organized and keep to a schedule, or things get out of hand,” Carrie says.
Craig and Carrie believe that someone from above had a particular plan for their family because all six of their children were born on the same day: Cece and J.J. on February 28, 2013, Adalynn and Kenna on February 28, 2014, and Karraline and Clarissa on February 28, 2016.
”We believe that because God adopted us into His family that we were meant to adopt these children into our family,” Carrie said. ”It’s such a huge blessing to us. We love all our children the same. We wouldn’t want our lives to be any different.”
Today, this family is enjoying life, and to see all these beautiful kids grow up must be such a blessing for Carrie and Craig.
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